Help With Writing Online Dating Profile Text

Jonathan Friesen - Writing Coach

Natalia lusinski / september 27, 2014 am most of us online date but many of us dont know how to market ourselves. After a while, all the profiles sound the same, full of similar clichés and adjectives. Looking for a partner in crime, are you my other half? and, my favorite, i like candlelit dinners, sunsets and walks on the beach yes, people still say that!.

If you look at ten random profiles right now, i bet you’ll find the same thing everyone’s funny and laid back and adventurous. I used to have a standard, generic profile, too, with a list of adjectives and facts: fun, outgoing, great speller looking back, not sure how that applied , and insert a bunch of other adjectives here. what? a service that’s devoted to writing dating profiles? yes! someone could have a ph.d. In neuroscience yet wouldn’t even get an associate’s degree in writing an online dating profile 101. Many of our clients were successful, personable people from grad students to physicists who would make great girlfriends and boyfriends once they had a dating profile that made them sound unique, one that couldn’t be cut and pasted into someone else’s. By the end of our phone call, i’d pare down what they’d said into an enticing short story while marketing their date ability in the process.

I’d make sure that every sentence focused on what the reader your future boyfriend or girlfriend could expect when dating you. The end result would be a profile that read like a good article or book jacket instead of a dating ad, and when someone reached the end of it, they’d want to read more and contact the person. Likes to say, it’s simply our job to capture you, like a cameraman taking a photo. So, why not revamp your online dating profile? here are the top things i learned when working with people on theirs that will work for you, too. 1 focus on the most important things. think of five adjectives that best describe you. Then, figure out and write down what’s most important to you, not everything that’s important to you. Do you like the smiths, or are you obsessed and make it a point to see every smiths cover band in your city? 2 like with any writing, show don’t tell, and the more specific, the better.

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And don’t use adjectives! evan is a big believer in redefining the adjective. Meaning, if you think you’re funny and state that you’re killing it in your stand up comedy class, you write the funniest messages in birthday cards and you make everyone at work laugh, that’s ok. But the e cyrano method would have you choose the best, most concise example of one time you were funny with an ex and put it into present tense: when you have a bad day, i’ll dress like homer your favorite simpsons character and do impressions of him until you feel better. 3 write 200 words or less.  one engaging paragraph is far better than endless run on sentences. Every word counts, so you want to make sure every sentence and story is memorable. You don’t have space to waste! besides, you’ll have plenty of time to share more on your actual date and during the phone calls or emails before the date. 4 double check that your profile will be appealing to the opposite sex and test it out conduct your very own focus group! pretend you’re the person who’s reading your profile.

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Would you want to date you? is it more intriguing to date someone who says he/she likes to try new things or who once ate jellyfish in china ? when stumped with coming up for a story for one of your adjectives, like thoughtful, just think of the best/most memorable/most unique things you did for exes. Then, have a few trusted opposite sex friends read your finished product and get their feedback. Or post your profile online and see what people respond to, then amend it from there. In no time, all your sentences of stories will mesh together to tell your future partner how they’ll benefit from dating you versus just learning about common interests you may have. Your online dating success is partly dependent on your ability to capture the interest and imagination of others through the words you write. While the task of writing a good online dating profile may be daunting for many people, it just takes a little time, effort, and know how. You just need to know some tricks of the trade to get noticed by the people you want, while weeding out those that dont interest you.

In person or on the telephone you can more easily get a feel for what another person is like and pick up a rich assortment of clues as to their personality from their voice. basic advice headlines and usernames your username says a lot about you princess452 or shy36 will generate assumptions in people. Resist temptation to refer to significant numbers such as age, phone numbers, date of birth etc in your username this gives unnecessary personal information, which you should avoid. Any headline usually appears in search lists, so it should be positive and catchy its one of the main things that will prompt the other party to click your profile and read on.

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Dating expert bonny albo is a writer and speaker with more than two decades of experience using the internet as a means to meet people. She 39 s published thousands of articles about dating and mating, is a recognized media expert on the topics of dating and relationships, and is a member of the canadian association of journalists. Read more next to choosing a dating site, writing your online dating profile is the most important thing you can do to attract someone for a date or relationship. What follows is a comprehensive five step process describing how to write a captivating online dating profile to attract a date. After filling out the basic demographic questions age, sex, location on the dating site that you chose.

The next question usually is, 34 what is your handle? 34 a handle or user name is the name other members of the dating site will use as your 34 name 34. On most dating sites, a handle cannot be used by two different members, thus making it a unique identifier. Very few online dating companies who ask for your real first name like yahoo personals does, but in these cases it is highly recommended that you create a fake user name anyway, to ensure your own personal safety. But not only does your handle need to be unique, it also needs to be personal, interesting and somehow indicative of who you are, without being off putting, too long or a challenge to pronounce.

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Although pronouncing your handle may seem counterintuitive, this is online dating after all! it will come in handy once you start meeting people. Because some people use only their handles as a personal identifier for some time, many online daters will come to use your handle as your 34 name 34 , and may even greet you by your handle upon meeting face to face. Caption: this chart shows 380 of the top 10 most commonly used words in profiles on okcupid. The color coding shows the average attractiveness rating of the people using those words.

Caption: it's sexier to play against gender stereotypes, than to fall prey to them. Every day, millions of singles crawl dating sites and apps, flipping through photos and profiles of potential matches. He’s got nice hair! she’s a skydiver! he’s a pastry chef! users skim profiles looking for a reason to send a message or dismiss hint: do not mention your mom or exes.

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Finding a date, let alone love, just isn’t easy even though there are plenty of apps for that. Here at wired, we couldn’t help but think there might be a better way to optimize your chances, so we pulled massive amounts of data from okcupid and match.com, searching for tips that might help you master internet dating and find someone awesome. Call it the algorithm method: working with data crunchers at the dating sites, we put together 25 tips for writing the perfect profile, selecting the right photo, and really understanding your audience. We analyzed the 1,0 most popular words on both men and women’s profiles, tabulated the most popular movies and tv shows, and crunched stats on what people consider their best feature vs. We even scoured the top 400 most popular okcupid profiles the hottest people on the site in ten us cities to see what their profile pics could tell the rest of us about attracting a date.

We couldn’t have done any of this without the help of the data maestros at match and okcupid: christian rudder, cofounder and president of okcupid, and jim talbott, director of consumer insights at match.com. These guys and their data teams ran queries of all kinds and pulled spreadsheet after spreadsheet of information to try and answer our strange questions. We also needed okcupid to get permission from their users to enable us to publish those popular profile pics. In short, we couldn’t have scraped all this data and derived this advice without the help of these talented data crunchers who are as dedicated to data analysis as we are.