Modern Love Essay Submission Text

Jonathan Friesen - Writing Coach

A compilation of daniel jones' submission tips for modern love, which are available in their original format on facebook. This blog is in no way affiliated with the new york times, modern love, or daniel jones. In the many essays i read every month, certain words, phrases, or stylistic tics appear again and again. Inevitably and maybe unfairly , some start to annoy or signal trouble with the writing to come. I rsquo ll always remember a literary agent who rsquo s a facebook friend of mine posted yesterday that a book she had declined to represent was just sold by someone else for seven figures.

A lot! although she was questioning herself, this happens to all of us editors and agents if not usually at the million dollar level. It rsquo s not uncommon for me to stumble across essays i rejected in other well read columns and magazines, occasionally even in other sections of the new york times. And we have all kinds of concerns and considerations specific to our little pieces of literary real estate that go beyond whether the writing appeals to us or doesn rsquo t. Yet a rejected writer often may internalize only one message: ldquo my work isn rsquo t good enough. If the writer with the seven figure book deal had decided her writing wasn rsquo t good enough after being turned away by my agent friend, she would be at least a million dollars poorer right now. We use the term ldquo publishable rdquo writing, as if there rsquo s some defined bar to clear, and that once you rsquo ve cleared it your writing should then be accepted by any reasonable editor.

One cautionary note: don rsquo t use the vagaries of taste as an excuse not to work hard at your writing, thinking all you have to do is blanket the editorial universe with your material until you find a sympathetic ear. Most writers i know who achieve regular success have spent about ten years at it mdash the same amount of time, in other words, that it takes to master anything, whether it be law, medicine, or ski racing. Twitter: @danjonesnyt ldquo for kayden kross, the family business happens to be porn rdquo last sunday rsquo s essay is less a case of ldquo why i chose it rdquo and more ldquo how it came to be, rdquo because the story didn rsquo t simply appear in my email inbox one day.

We don rsquo t hire writers to tell their stories, but in rare cases i go looking and offer an invitation to submit. We heard reports of their love lives, particularly about the hookup culture, but little from the students themselves. So in 2008 i held a college essay contest to see what they had to say, and then i held another three years later. In the end, we printed 10 winners from nearly 30 entries, and the results were much appreciated by readers. Similarly, i was curious about the transgender experience, particularly as it applies to an existing relationship in which one person undergoes a sex change. How does a couple deal with that? no one was offering to explain, so i went searching.

Eventually i found an essay on the subject by the writer jenny finney boylan that was scheduled to appear in a forthcoming anthology, and i was able to adapt her eye opening story for the column. These are important stories, shedding light on situations that had been in the shadows, but they can be mighty hard to come by. While people may have strong and varied opinions about porn rsquo s impact, safety and morality, there rsquo s no denying its growing prevalence in the internet age. My curiosity was basic: how do performers have relationships in this business? how do they feel about their work? what are their hopes and fears? and what story might best illustrate these complexities? i wanted to find out. So with the help of a colleague who has contacts in the industry, i identified performers with possible stories to tell and the ability to tell them. I invited her to submit her writing, asking her those same basic questions and many more. Daniel jones, the editor of the times modern love column, held a facebook forum to answer frequently asked questions about the column.

And most questions involved some iteration on tips for getting an essay about the way we love now published in the newspaper and maybe even animated . As editor of modern love, i am constantly fielding questions about the column that i dont have time to answer individually, though often these questions cover the same territory, mr. If you dont have a question but like the idea, then like the post and ill have a better sense of whether its worthwhile.

The faq was billed as ask the editor almost anything the almost referred to questions about specific stories. Jones instructed readers not to ask whether he would be interested in an essay about a fling with a cabaret singer. Most of the questions dealt with general submission guidelines: how long does it take to get published after an essay is accepted, formating, word count, that sort of thing. The basic answer is that, although publication history is not considered, experienced writers are usually better writers, which means that they are more likely to be selected to run in the column. I often romanticize turning a pivotal moment in my life into the next great american essay, as defined by its acceptance into the new york times modern love column.

Millennial or not, copeland’s first step in this process was the inevitable: procrastination research. Down the research rabbit hole, she discovered that modern love editor, daniel jones. Is a magical wizard providing an abundance of tips, via social media, on writing personal essays. Confident other people would benefit from daniels wisdom, copeland collected all the tips she could find into a google doc and made it public. if personal essay is your specialty, you’re going to devour, bookmark and obsess over this doc. like copeland, i’ve been working on my own maybe sometime modern love will publish it essay for the last six months.

And while i think it’s more than worth reading the entire doc yourself, i’m going to share the tips that resonated with me most. Jones has shared many tips on essay structure, but they can essentially be boiled down into these three categories:

    don’t underestimate the power of a reader’s curiosity this includes the editor don’t give away the ending in your cover letter. A happy ending is when the writer understands something he or she didn’t understand before. Its more intriguing for us to be dropped into the action than to receive all the background information up front.
remember why people read stories: because we want to find out what happens. when i read this tip i immediately went back into my essay and cut the first two paragraphs, moved my what happened in the end to the actual end, and added one sentence of clarification halfway through. Even though you want to draw people in at the beginning, that’s not a free pass to give away the ending.

Essay Advice

on patience: embrace the process of discovery this is probably the most important, difficult, infuriating and comforting tip in this compilation. Which then turned into a story about how my first boyfriend is impacting my brand new marriage. I re write this thing for an hour every damn day and it’s still not close to being done. i’ve learned that writing for modern love isn’t like journalism or writing a blog post. it’s therapy. You only understand the point of your essay after youve spent a lot of time and effort working on it. And now, instead of getting frustrated every time i haven’t perfected this thing, it’s actually given me a lot of comfort in the process.

My six months and counting essay has been through a memoir class, a re write, a professional editor, another re write, two writer friends and now a third re write. Jones has emphasized that modern love stories are often the most important experiences in a writer’s life. The editor wants to think this is your best story, not one of 20 essays youve dashed off and sent out to dozens of outlets all at once, jones says. What if you’ve already submitted and were rejected, or told to rework? don’t immediately send back a few minor edits. The editor doesnt want to see it back so soon, and, fair or not, hell think you rushed it and wont view the revision optimistically, jones warns.

on editing: words to avoid the more i read jones’ tips about submitting to modern love, the more i realize he’s not actually inundated with bad writers. That said, i love the polishing part of my job, so here are a few tips jones provides on writing: remove words like that, adverbs, exclamation points and double spaces after periods.

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Choose adjectives that will work harder for you not filler adjectives like amazing and terrible .

on submitting: be professional and humble before you jump on me for the obviousnessness of this tip, read the document. just because that particular essay wasn’t right for an editor doesn’t mean the next one won’t be. don’t let a hot temper screw up a relationship with an editor. I was also pleasantly surprised to read about ambivalence towards writers who brag about their accomplishments. Jones says, i pay little attention to someones writing background when i read an essay. I’m not particularly accomplished, and the fact that jones doesn’t only want to publish successful writers fills me with hope.

But even if i were, or if i did want to spew the few accomplishments i do have, i hate that bragging is the only way to represent the quality of your work. Plus, is it just me, or is it obnoxious when writers list off every publication they’ve ever written for? i want to smooch jones for being open and candid about this issue. Other ways to be professional include immediately letting jones or any other editor know if your piece has sold elsewhere. Before you leave to devour this amazing document: don’t get hung up on every tip. Read and absorb what you can, but remember to trust yourself and your writing. Copeland said it best: in hindsight, i shouldve added a disclaimer to the top of the doc: ‘use your time wisely. Each minute you spend reading writing advice is a minute you wont spend writing.’ after reading and re reading copeland’s compilation, i feel both hopeful and defeated.